Memorialising a Loved One with a Living Tribute Garden

As a funeral florist, I've had the privilege of helping families create meaningful tributes to honour their loved ones. While traditional cut flower arrangements have their beauty and significance, there's something truly special about creating a living tribute garden that continues to bloom long after the funeral is over.

Imagine a garden filled with vibrant blooms, each one representing a cherished memory of your loved one. Instead of a fleeting arrangement that withers away in a few days, a living flower design composed of small plants offers a lasting tribute. After the funeral, this living tribute can be moved to your garden, where it becomes a permanent fixture, a place of solace and remembrance.

Even if you don't have a garden, there are alternatives to consider. A window box or a large pot can serve as a miniature garden, bringing the beauty of nature into your home and serving as a daily reminder of your loved one's presence.

One of my clients chose to honour both her mother and father with living tributes. She has kindly given me permission to share her picture of the plants that have reappeared for the last few years. It's truly heartwarming to see how these living tributes can bring solace and comfort to those left behind.

But living tributes don't have to stop at the garden. For a larger-scale memorial, consider purchasing a bench and a memorial plaque to place in a woodland area or park. This creates a lasting legacy that extends beyond the individual, with each passing season serving as a reminder of a life well lived.

Another beautiful option is to plant a tree in memoriam. Each tree species carries its own symbolism, offering hope, resilience, and renewal. Whether it's the Silver Birch symbolising regeneration or the willow representing survival in the face of adversity, planting a tree is a powerful way to honour a loved one's memory while making a positive impact on the environment.

Several organisations, such as the Woodland Trust, National Trust, and Life for a Life, offer tree planting services, making it easy to create a lasting tribute that will stand the test of time.

In times of grief, finding ways to honour and remember our loved ones is essential for healing. Whether it's through a living tribute garden, a memorial bench, or a planted tree, these gestures not only keep their memory alive but also bring comfort and solace to those left behind. As a funeral florist, it's truly fulfilling to see the impact these living tributes have on families as they navigate their journey of grief and remembrance.

The emotional and psychological benefits of flowers during times of grief

Losing a loved one is never easy. The weight of grief can feel overwhelming, leaving us struggling to find solace in the midst of sadness. However, amidst the darkness, there is light to be found in the presence of flowers.

However, it's not just about cut flowers - simply taking a stroll, inhaling the fresh air, absorbing the scenery, and even admiring foliage can be uplifting. Even if the flowers aren't in full bloom, the leaves are still appealing and sometimes fragrant. Immersing oneself in the delicate details of flowers can offer a much-needed escape from the daily pain. The senses of touch, sight, and smell can transport us to a different, more serene place.

During a funeral, flowers can serve as a comforting focal point when everything else seems overwhelming. The fragrance of the flowers can be soothing, and certain floral arrangements may carry symbolic meanings that provide solace to those grieving. Sometimes, when words fail, flowers can express exactly what we're feeling.

In addition to offering solace before and during a funeral, flowers can also be a meaningful way to honour the memory of a loved one on the anniversary of their passing - a gesture that can be just as impactful down the line. Grief may not fade away completely, but it may evolve over time. For instance, after my Mum's passing, friends gifted me a rose bush as a thoughtful reminder that they were thinking of me and a beautiful symbol of my Mum’s enduring presence in my life.

It's important to acknowledge that every individual grieves differently. While some may prefer not to have a traditional funeral service, opting instead for a memorial focused on flowers and photographs, others may find solace in a more traditional approach. Some flowers may evoke negative memories - perhaps the individual disliked the scent of lilies, while others may bring about positive reminiscences, like the partner who always received a bouquet of red roses. It's essential to respect each person's unique grieving process and find healing through the beauty and symbolism of flowers.

Floral memorials for Pet Funerals

I was talking to friends this morning about how our dogs become so much part of the family,  for good reason.....they are our companions and confidants, and offer us comfort and unconditional love. And not necessarily just dogs but cats, guinea pigs, horses, whatever your passion.  

Some may argue that they are "just" pets, but as devoted pet owners, we have to disagree. Our pets become like children to us, and their passing leaves an indescribable void in our lives. It is natural, then, that we want to find ways to celebrate their lives and help us grieve, much like we would for any loved one.

So, the question is, should we honour our pets in the same way we do for humans? The answer lies within your own heart. If your pet holds a special place in your life, why not celebrate their life and passing? It doesn't have to be elaborate or complicated; simple gestures can make all the difference.

Consider adorning your pet's final resting place with a small posy of flowers or a potted plant. For example, my guinea pigs rest beneath a beautiful rosemary bush – did you know that rosemary signifies remembrance? Including rosemary in a bouquet is a lovely way to pay tribute to your beloved friend. You could even create a posy of greens, carrots, and cauliflower, incorporating all their favourite foods. These heartfelt gestures provide comfort and bring a touch of their essence to the memorial.

Just like with human funerals, I highly recommend taking pictures of these floral creations. They serve as tangible memories of your cherished pet, bringing a smile to your face even during the most difficult times. These images capture the beauty and love shared between you and your furry companion, ensuring their spirit lives on.

It is important to know that there is no right or wrong way to remember and honour our pets. Each tribute is as unique as the bond we shared with them. Whether it's through simple floral arrangements, photos, or any other personal memento, the key is to find what resonates with you and brings comfort to your grieving heart.

In conclusion, our pets are more than just animals; they are family. Their impact on our lives deserves to be acknowledged and celebrated. So, as you mourn their passing, consider incorporating floral memorials as a way to honour and remember them. By paying tribute to their lives, we validate the love and connection we share, bringing solace during this difficult time.

DIY Winter Wreaths: How to Create Your Own Wreath At Home

Instead of heading to the store to buy greenery and decorations, take a look around your garden or on your walks to see what you can find. This adds to the creative process and can be quite therapeutic. Just remember to be aware of any foraging laws in your area. If you're feeling bold, ask your neighbours if you can cut back some of their greenery – they'll likely be more than happy to oblige!

Suggested sundries: garden twine, string or raffia, 

                                      Scissors or secateurs

                                      Bucket or vase

                                      Collection of greenery

                                      Cones, feathers, seed heads

There's something incredibly satisfying about going out on a crisp morning walk and stumbling upon treasures like cones, berries, and seed heads. Once you've gathered your branches, twigs, and greenery, be sure to place them in water for a few hours or overnight to condition them properly.

First, you'll need something to form the base of your wreath. If you have dogwood, willow, or bendy branches from a tree, those will work great. Wind and weave these branches or stems into a circular shape to create a strong and secure structure. If you're concerned about them holding together, you can always use a bit of garden twine to secure them in place. Don't forget to add a loop to one of the branches to hang up your finished wreath!

Once your base is ready, it's time to start adding the greenery. Ivy is a great option and can be wrapped around the base or fed into the structure. If you found any cones, you can attach them to the wreath by wrapping string, twine, or raffia at the base and securing them in place. Feel free to let your imagination run wild with this – you can incorporate hydrangea heads, box, conifer, dried fern leaves, grasses, and more. Just be careful with holly – those leaves can be prickly!

Remember, if something doesn't work or you're not happy with it, don't be afraid to remove it and replace it with something else. The great thing about this DIY wreath is that it's fully compostable and eco-friendly.

Whether you want to create a large wreath or a smaller one with limited materials, it doesn't matter. What matters is that you're proud of your creativity and what you've achieved. I would love for you to give this a try – feel free to send me a picture of your masterpiece. Happy wreath making!

Unique Autumn Inspired Funeral Flower Ideas

The abundance of summer gives way to less choice in flowers (particularly local farm grown) in Autumn, so it's sometimes necessary to consider using other items within the floral farewell pieces.  

When arranging autumn florals there are so many wonderful natural elements to bring in, it's not always about the blooms; there are seed pods, skeletal stems, horse chestnuts, cones and acorns to name a few.  Leaves in an array of colours.  Pumpkins and gourds.  If someone was an avid gardener and loved their plot or allotment why not include fruit or veg into the design?

For those who appreciate a more rustic and natural look, incorporating twigs, branches, and dried grass can create a beautiful autumn-inspired piece. These elements bring a sense of nostalgia and the beauty of nature's cycle into the arrangement. Adding in some dried lavender or lavender essential oil can also bring a calming and soothing scent to the arrangement.

One flower that comes into its own in Autumn is the Chrysanthemum offering beautiful shades of bronze, pink and red or sunny yellows, golds, creams and whites.  Did you know that the Chrysanthemum means different things to different people and cultures?  In Japan the flower signifies death and whilst many of us associate it with this too, it can also represent rebirth.  The flower can be used to remember a long life full of happiness and joy.

The garden design for a cherished Dad (below) reminds us of the change in seasons. Cones and bark add interest and different textures, whilst rosemary signifies remembrance of the loved one. Dahlias, like Chrysanthemum, epitomise the tones and seasonality of Autumn.

As a funeral florist, it is always important to listen to the wishes and preferences of the grieving family. Whether they prefer a more traditional floral arrangement or want to incorporate the beauty and symbolism of autumn, there are endless possibilities to create a unique and meaningful tribute.

In conclusion, autumn offers a variety of unique and creative options when it comes to funeral flower arrangements. By incorporating natural elements, using seasonal flowers, and adding personal touches, you can create a beautiful and meaningful tribute that honours the life of the departed. Remember, it's not just about the blooms, but also about bringing in the essence of the season and the memories of the loved one.

Floral Foam Alternatives: Nurturing Eco-Friendly Blooms

Like many individuals, when the COVID-19 pandemic struck, I found myself contemplating how to make the most of my time. I began to delve deeply into eco-friendly methods of flower arranging, and my research led me to explore the use of 'oasis' foam. As the flower secretary at my church for numerous years, we had always relied on floral foam (commonly known as oasis), and my college education had never introduced me to alternative options.

Were you aware that a single block of floral foam is equivalent to the plastic in 10 carrier bags? This material is composed of microplastics and even contains formaldehyde. It does not biodegrade, and even those labelled as biodegradable do so only under specific conditions that we have no control over once they end up in a landfill. The more I learned, the more resolute I became in my mission to make our church arrangements, as well as my commercial work, completely foam-free.

I felt a strong urge to encourage people to explore alternatives to floral foam. With this in mind, I decided to organise a demonstration showcasing foam-free flower arrangements. I was grateful for the support of more than 20 ladies from our church, other congregations, and even non-churchgoers eager to learn about eco-friendly options. It was an ideal opportunity to raise funds for a worthy cause as well, and the Billericay Foodbank immediately came to mind. The ladies gathered to learn about the convenience of floral foam, but also the harm it inflicts on the environment, as it breaks down into water sources, harming both humans and aquatic life. We discussed alternatives such as pin frogs, chicken wire, moss, Agra wool, and recycled glass jars, along with creative ideas for thinking "outside the box" when arranging flowers.

I also shared insights about the Royal Horticultural Society (RHS) banning the use of floral foam in all their shows since 2020, and the 'Sustainable Church Flowers' (SCF) movement within the Church of England. If you're interested, please visit their websites for more information. Our discussion extended to the environmental impact of imported flowers, their carbon footprint, and the effects on residents in farming areas. I suggested locally sourced flowers and foliage be considered, with additional details available from a membership association called 'Flowers from the Farm.' Local blooms offer various advantages over commercial varieties, including delightful scents and the charm of uniquely shaped stems.

Our gathering was not just about talk; we also demonstrated some of the foam alternatives and ended up with a beautiful locally sourced floral arrangement for the Communion table and a stunning Pedestal design. I'm delighted to report that we raised £250 for the Foodbank during the event.

I acknowledge that these changes won't occur overnight, but in a time when our planet is undergoing significant transformations, I encourage everyone to take steps toward creating foam free church arrangements and to think consciously about how flowers are presented when given as gifts.

My Journey as a Funeral Florist

Did I intend to become a florist? If I'm honest, I'd probably say no! After having kids, I knew I wanted to pursue something creative because my previous job as a civil servant didn't really interest me. While it had its moments, I wanted to find something that truly sparked my passion while still allowing me to take care of my children.

Discovering My Passion for Floral Design:

Discovering my passion for floral design came several years later after attending college courses and gaining experience. I started by arranging wedding flowers, which I enjoyed, but it was the funeral work that truly ignited my passion. It's not just about the flowers and creating a design, it's also about listening to the client. Looking back, my experience in the office job actually provided a good foundation for this. As an officer of the Public Trust Office, I was accustomed to helping people who were unable to manage their own finances. It required delicately discussing their needs with their representatives.

As a visual person, I tend to sketch out a few ideas and write down my thoughts when designing a funeral piece. Then, I step away and let them sink in. If it's a complex design, I may consider various options before making a final decision. Ensuring the mechanics of the design work before even considering the flowers allows me to focus on choosing the right foliage and florals.

Inspiring and Crafting Unique Tributes:

Inspiration for my designs often stems from conversations with clients. We discuss how they remember the deceased, including funny moments, unique traits, and passions. It's a privilege to hear their stories. However, it can be challenging at times, especially when I'm surrounded by an entire family with different preferences. Emotions can run high, and my previous office experience comes in handy as I navigate these situations with sensitivity, acting as a mediator. I prefer not to rush people, but decisions need to be made, so I gently guide them toward a conclusion regarding the design.

Navigating Grief and Emotional Resilience:

Attending client meetings can be quite stressful sometimes because I never know what to expect. However, I rely on my judgement and experience to offer advice and guidance. As a sensitive person, I sometimes find it difficult not to become emotional, especially if I know the family well. 

However, I believe this is what makes my work personal, as I can empathise with their grief. It's a responsibility to ensure the arrangement reflects their desires, and I am willing to go the extra mile to make it special. The little touches can make all the difference: a football badge, a wheatsheaf, a bee, knitting and needles—these help bring back fond memories. Sometimes even a particular herb or flower because it reminds them of their loved one.

When the work becomes difficult, the first thing I do when I get home is relax with a cup of tea. It's crucial for me to maintain my physical health as it positively impacts my mental well-being and stamina. So, I often take my dog for a walk and enjoy playing a few games of tennis.

If you’re looking to pay your final respects to someone special in your life, but need some assistance in choosing funeral flowers, you can read my blog here. Alternatively, get in touch with me directly here.

From Traditional to Contemporary: Exploring the Evolution of Funeral Flowers

Funeral flowers, though often associated with modern times, have a history that stretches back centuries. In fact, evidence of their use dates as far back as 62,000 BC. While they were originally employed to mask the smell of the deceased, over time, they evolved to symbolise love and respect. However, not all cultures incorporate flowers into their funeral rites. Followers of religions such as Judaism and Islam, for example, have different customs and do not traditionally use funeral flowers.

Today we use funeral flowers to help the grieving process, especially when we find it hard to express our thoughts and emotions - flowers can say so much. They can also be used to symbolise whether it be colour, flower type or design - from the white lily which many associate with death, the colour red portraying love, to the circle of eternal life of the never ending wreath.

The history of funeral flowers includes an interesting influence from the past. During the time of Queen Victoria, mourning her beloved Prince Albert, it became fashionable for people to dress entirely in black as a sign of grief. Funeral flowers, during that era, were opulent and extravagant, reflecting the status and wealth of the deceased's family. However, for those less fortunate, their options for floral arrangements were limited. Despite economic hardships, many families set aside money for funerals to ensure their loved ones did not receive a "pauper's funeral." Maybe this is why some people prefer to set up prepaid funeral plans today.

Over time, companies have produced premade bases such as letters and specific design shapes because of increased demands.  Whilst these have aided the florists and cut down on their time, little has been said about the long term effects of these products, such as plastic bases and floral foam.  Trends are changing, albeit slowly, where clients are more aware of the knock on effect of these items and so we are now almost full circle.  We can use alternatives to commercial bases, branches and moss, chicken wire, items that will decompose or can be recycled.

The evolution of funeral flowers highlights the importance of cultural traditions and the impact of changing values in society. From their ancient practical origins to their modern emotional significance, funeral flowers have served as a poignant way to pay respects and console those who are grieving. As we strive for a more sustainable and compassionate world, the transformation in the funeral flower industry is a testament to our collective effort to cherish our loved ones and the environment they leave behind.